Part 2: DENMARK
Our flight to Paris was going out of Copenhagen. The In-Laws suggested we take a trip down to Copenhagen the night before and spend a day in Denmark. Sight see and all that jazz.
To get to Denmark, one must drive for what seems like the length of the Sex and The City movie. And, just as boring.
Lot's of trees and trees and...wait, is that an old historic green church? nope. Just two trees next to eachother. To cross into Denmark you must take a really long bridge. This bridge is the "black dude" of bridges (if you know what I mean). It's long.
After 17 days of driving on this bridge, we arrived in Copenhagen. Copenhagen is very different then Sweden when it comes to street names. All the street names in Copenhagen look like what happens when you let your baby slam his hands on the keyboard with an email open. You know, you get thing looking like this: "fredrikssudnmotorvejen" (this is actually a real street name in Copenhagen). My guess is that nobody throws any damn house parties in that city. Nobody wants to deal with writing the directions in the invite by email.
"Crap. How was that street off the highway exit called? Rosjkildevej? Is it two "J"s? A silent "K"? Crap! I still have 6 more turns to write on these directions. This is going to take forever!"
I would love to drive a car with one of those speaking GPS systems in Copenhagen. Just smoke some pot and sit in the car and laugh my ass off when the voice lady goes "in 0.3 kilometers, turn left on Klovermarkenjan. Turn right on Valensbakenit". The system will probably crash if I just take it into a 5 point intersection. Me and Sexy Wife's dad actually stopped at a liquor store to ask for directions for the hotel. Can you imagine trying to pronounce the names of these streets to someone? It took us like 30 minutes just to get the guy to understand us.
"Ohhh, you are looking for Osterbroggen. I thought you said Osterbrokken!"
It is really frustrating.
I bet if someone did a study, they would find that tourists just vanish in Denmark every year. Its like the European bermuda triangle. They can't find the damn airport. They just get lost in Denmark forever.
We arrived at the hotel. Very small and cute. In the heart of the city. Well, maybe not the heart...perhaps the Spleen of the city. Whatever. We took a walk through the beautiful shopping district and checked out the castle of the King and Queen as well as some monuments and beautiful buildings that look like something out of a MTV Cribs in the 1500's.
The one thing that did bug me was the attitude. Danish people are not very nice. Very mean and kind of "I don't give a shit" attitude. We got that everywhere. I know I am American and that we are not very liked throughout Europe. I knew that coming there. But the Danish are just piss stubborn people. Just rude. Waiters, bartenders, clerks, employes at the supermarket, people at the hotel, people on the street, homeless people. They are all just crude.
I can understand. After all they have 5.5 million people and the thing they are most famous for is LEGO. Seriously. We got 5 million people and the thing the whole world knows us for is little plastic blocks. That's got to piss some people off. That's like looking at Israel and saying "No, you won't be known for being the Holy Land. No you won't be known as the place that has Jerusalem. Instead, from all the wonderful things you have to offer to the world, you shall be famous across the universe as the country that spawned Hummus. Oh, what a delicious delicacy it is indeed. People around the world will say "Israel. Land of the Hummus!"
Nobody wants to feel like in the thousands of years your country existed and with all the wars and inventions and great scholars they had, to be known at the end of the day as the place that is famous for LEGO. So I understand why everyone is so pissy. They probably get a lot of tourists "Excuse me, where is the bus pick up for the LEGO tour?". All the Danish (Danes?, I dunno what they go by) are probably all "Piss Off!"
The other place we went to check out was Christiania. Also known as Freetown. It is a residential area (about 85 acres) of about 850 residents who, within the areas limits are free to do drugs. Basically, if you want to smoke pot or do ecstasy with your first date, this will be the place to go and do it because its legal there. Problem is, the place looks like shit. First, they do not allow photos in there. Not that anyone would want it. Nobody goes around taking photos of your cousin's ugly ass baby. Nobody wants photo of that kid on their fridge. Well, its the same with this place. It looks like an atomic bomb of "Ugly" got dropped there. The buildings are torn up, the floors and roads are all dirt and covered in garbage. And all the people hanging out there look like homeless crack heads. There was tons of police and alot of high idiots talking shit. It was neat to watch people rolling up joints in front of police officers but then again, if you have to hang out here, I would really not trust what's in that joint. The place makes Gaza strip look like 5th Ave.
So Denmark was interesting. Short stay as I said. Saw the city. Ate some food. Had some coffee and bread that the in-laws brought with them. Good times over all.
And, ofcourse in the spirit of LEGO, I could not resist posting this:
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