A City By Any Other Name

New York, NY.  

So Nice, they named it twice.  

Either that, or the guy who named it had a stutter. 

I came across an article today on Gawker.com that had a list of all the nicknames New York City has (to my amazement, a total of 98).  Some were ok (like the obvious ones: "Big Apple", "Capital of the World", etc.) some were lame ("The City Of Friendly People"....who are you kidding?).

But then I got to the comment section,  I have to be honest, the names in there are more dead on then anything.  I agree with 90% of them.  Whoever thinks of lame nicknames for cities makes me think that the people naming them don't even live here.  I asked 5 different people  in NYC already why the heck its called "The Big Apple" and nobody knows!  

So, instead of giving credit to the lame douchbags who named this place ("Americas Mecca"? kind of odd since Muslim terrorist attacked this city) or ("Financial Capital"? I think we have a lot of unemployed Bear Sterns employees who would disagree with that name).

So, I figured I will give props to the real New Yorkers.  The ones who call this place by what they see, hear, smell, experience and deal with.   After all, nobody knows this city better then the people putting up with it. 

Here are some of my favorites, followed by a link to the original article:

 

1. City of 1000 smells

2. The World Capital Of Pushing Tourists Down Escalators

3. That Place Next To Brooklyn

4. The City Where Summers Smell Bad

5. If You Can Make It Here, You Have A Really Good Map City

6. Cockaroach Alley

7. There Is Homeless Poop On The Subway Here City

8. The Rental Rape Capital of the World

9. The Land We Were Fucked Over for $24 of Beads and Trinkets (as the Native Americans would call it)

10. Flasher's Paradise

11. Land of the $1000 an hour Hooker

12. Jewtopia

13. The City Where The Answer Is Always "Go Fuck Yourself!"

14. Sunnyvale Acres For Hobos

15. Land of the Unemployed Investment Bankers

16. New Fuckin Yawk 

17. Who Wants To Know

18. As they call it in Brooklyn "The fuckin' city"

19. Land Of Atleast It's Not New Jersey

20. Where We're Not Unfriendly, We Just Don't Give a Shit About You.  There's a Difference.

21. Sorry We Are All Booked Up Tonight City

22. Puerto "We Ain't No Fuckin' Mexicans" Rican Paradise

23. The I Didn't See Your Name On The List Town

and finally, my favorite and the one I call it myself:  "Home".

The link to the Gawker Article: 

http://gawker.com/372922/the-city-of-superlatives