My wife should be thankful. I was on the verge of getting E.A.D (Early Adaption Disorder) about nine years ago.
Remember when the Star Wars, Phantom Menace movie came out in 1999? I was one of the douchbags who camped out in line the night before to be one of the few who got to be the very first to see it. I actually remember the ticket they gave me read "#581". I was the 581st person in the whole U.S. to see that movie the day it came out. I was proud.
I remember camping out next to a guy in a full Chewbacca suit. I swear, the guy stayed in character the whole time. Til this day I still have no idea who he was. He replied to everything with the infamous Chewy growl. Even when I went to make a Subway or a beer run, I'd ask if he wants anything and the guy just sat there grawling with that gargling sounds while raising his hairy arm in the air. It was amazing. I don't even remember him going to the bathroom. He slept in the outfit. Ate nachos through the mask. He even sat next to me in the theatre in the whole outfit and when the movie was done, he high-fived me with the giant hand. I, for a brief moment in my life, felt like Han-Solo.
I wanted to be the first to see the first of the Star Wars since the last one. I know, I know, this sentence hardly makes sense, but neither did my reasons back then. Looking back now, I think it was kind of creepy that I slept one tent away from a guy who likes to wear an outfit for 48 hours. People put restraining orders against people like that, and here, I thought I was Han-Fuckin'-Solo. WTF was I thinking?
Nine years later, I changed a lot. I used to want to be the first at things. Be the first to own this, be the first to do that. But then, I got a job and an apartment and many other responsibilities and unfortunately for me (but fortunate for my wife) I could no longer afford being an Early Adaptor, and so, I fell into the Late Adaption group. Matter of fact, I am such a late adopter, I should be in the Senior Citizen Adaption Group. I got my plasma TV when people already moved to LCD. I got my Wii, when people already moved to XBOX 360 and Playstation 68!
I heard of Blu-Ray DVD's after they already beat the HD. I heard of Guitar Hero after they already released like twenty six versions of it.
Don't get me wrong, I read things like Gizmodo.com and try to stay on top of the gadget world. But I never buy it. Just can't afford the $4,000 86 inch plasma TV with the $800 Blu-Ray DVD player that syncs up to your XBOX so you can surf your movies online while playing Halo and watching Oldschool all at the same time.
The one thing I really nagged my wife about was the iPhone. Here was a toy that I really thought is cool. The only reason I didn't go and throw my IRS refund on it was because I have to sign a contract to AT&T with it. Me being the Jew that I am, I don't like the idea of paying for something once, and then continuing to pay for it over time. It's like paying the full price of a Prius, and then still paying monthly payments on it. So I gave up all hope on having an iPhone as long as it is 1) so darn expensive or 2) moves away from AT&T so that I don't have to pay a penalty.
Now the new iphones are coming out on Friday. They are less, so one would think I would jump up and get one. Nope. Why? Because I am a late adapter. I was hoping to buy the first version of the iPhone when everyone else is already on the 6th version. Why? because it would be cheap and I would not feel bad if I break it because by then, I can go on Craigslist and buy a new one for $75. I did this with my Palm Pilot like two years ago. By the time I got a Palm, the rest of the world had "Blackberrys" (or "African-American Berrys". Not sure what's the proper way of calling them now).
So now, I sit back and wait for the iPhone to stop being the "IT" thing and then I will get mine.
But, that does not keep me away from laughing at others for being douchbags. Which I will do now:
The new iPhone 3G comes out on Friday. Today is Monday. Yet, some thought it would be great to start camping out at the Apple Store on 59th here in NYC. Yes, I will make fun of someone who is doing what I did for Star Wars. Atleast I got to sit next to a guy in a hairy costume. If you are sitting on 59th street in front of an Apple store next to a guy with hair on his body, well, that just means you are sitting next to the guy who works at the Pizza spot across the street from my house. That mother'ucker is a hairy bastard. Hardly speaks English too, so he probably growls just like Chewbacca.
Anyway, have fun Early Adaptors. I will call you in 4 years in response to your craigslist posting named "used iPhone first generation. Selling for $50".
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